Adoption over Abortion



In light of the recent news about the state of New York and its decision to allow late term abortions my heart is deeply saddened. I am very much pro life and simply can not fathom the thought of willingly killing my unborn child, no matter how young or old the fetus is. In my opinion, life simply begins at conception, the very moment that egg is fertilized it becomes a living being and has a right to live. I get it that not everyone agrees and that’s okay because everyone is entitled to their own opinions. However, for me it goes beyond my opinion and begins to effect me on a spiritual level. Every child that has ever been conceived is a blessing from God and it is heart breaking that those children never get a chance at life outside of the womb. I get it, I get it … we as women have rights, it’s our body we have a choice blah blah blah, but what about the rights of that child? Better yet, what about the rights of the father of that child? I would agree that most men are probably relieved that the “unwanted burden” can so easily be “taken care of”. However, there are some that are not so eager to take that route. I would be willing to guess that some would even be fantastic fathers if given the chance. We sadly live in a world that really has no regard for human life. If you don’t believe me, just turn on the news, read a newspaper or scroll through your social media accounts. Every day there is a news report of someone dying at the hands of another human being, sadly age doesn’t seem to matter.

With no regard for human life it really should not come as a suprise that late term abortions are now becoming legal. Obviously, I have never been in the shoes of a young girl or woman faced with the difficult decision of an unwanted pregnancy. I have no idea what I would have done if a child was conceived as a result of something that  was forced upon me, such as rape. I also don’t know what my response would have been if the doctor told me that my own life could possibly be in jeopardy. However, for me to make the conscious decision to willingly engage in a sexual manner where a child was conceived as a result; I just don’t believe I would have terminated the pregnancy to avoid the embarrasment that it would have caused me. I don’t write this post as a way to attack women who have made that very difficult decision, it is quite the opposite affect that I hope to accomplish. I pray that these women find the peace within themselves to let go of that empty hole that is within their hearts. I want them to allow God to heal that hurt that is buried deep within their souls. It is my belief that women who have made that decision didn’t have a real relationship with God and didn’t know the hope that He had planned for their futures.

While I can not wrap my brain around making that kind of decision, I do want others to know that God’s love, grace and mercy endures forever. We have all sinned and fall short of the glory of God, but that does not mean that we don’t deserve forgiveness and the opportunity to live life in the freedom of God’s Love. As Christians we sometimes get so caught up in trying to avoid sin that we often times become judgemental and even unloving to others that so desperately just need our love. In doing so we then find ourselves living in sin by our judgemental thoughts and criticizing attitudes. When all you have is a negative opinion on someone else’s life, yet offer no love or solution then you become part of the problem. Scripture tells us in John 3:17 that God did not send His Son into the world to judge the world, but to save the world through Him. That one verse should change anyone’s attitude when it comes to judgemental and condemning thoughts about others. I personally know the freedom of God’s grace and forgiveness on my life. I’ve made some terrible decisions and done things that I am absolutely not proud of. I have been hurt in this life, but I have also hurt others. I am not immune to the pain and heartache of this world and neither is anyone else. Unfortunately, we allow these pains in our own lives to cause pain in the lives of others. We have all heard the saying “hurt people, hurt other people”, and that is so true. I don’t believe they hurt others on purpose, I just think they don’t know how to handle disappointments in their own lives so the easiest way to handle the pain is to deflect it onto someone else.

With all of that being said and the constant division that is being sown into this nation, I truly encourage you to look for the good in others. Womean, instead of us fighting against each other, why not fight together. Let us help one another carry the burdens that are placed on us. If you find yourself in a situation where you are experiencing an unwanted pregnancy, surround yourself with people who are going to encourage you. Don’t listen to the lie that the devil tries to tell you, you know the one that says a baby will ruin your life. A baby will in every way change your life, but in no way will a baby ruin your life.

I can not begin to tell you how much adoption has changed my life. All because of two very brave women who decided to carry their babies to term and then allowed someone else to raise them. Both of these amazing women considered abortion at some point during their pregnancy, yet they chose to give these babies a chance at life. I am beyond thankful that they did, because without the selfless sacrifice of these beautiful souls, this world would be missing three of the most precious gifts ever given to me. I am the face of infertility, I am the face of sexual abuse, I am the face of divorce, I am the face of miscarriage, I am the face of failed adoptions, I am the face of a foster mom, but most importantly …. I am the face of a Mother. Please don’t look at my life now and be envious of my now, because I have walked through a life time of hell to finally be at a place of peace. It took years of obedience to get to my blessing. Our family is crazy chaos and beautifully blended, but it didn’t happen overnight. So no matter where you are in your journey, just know that God has a plan. I pray specifically to my sisters who find themselves in a place of confusion, unsure of what to do. Just remember, adoption will always give you the option to “know” the child you created, abortion will not.

Disclaimer: I wrote this a year ago when there was such a focus on the late term abortions in New York. I am not sure why I never published it, however, as I was preparing for an upcoming speaking engagement, I found it in my drafts and decided to share it.

Author: nikkigossettjustmom

I am a wife and mother to 2 children and 4 bonus children. My heart's desire was to always be a mom and God has given me that title in the most beautiful way. Although I have suffered years of infertility and still do not have any biological children, I am able to hold the title of “Mom” because God gave it to me. I became a “bonus” mom to four beautiful children in 2012 when I married the love of my life, Adam. In 2016 God saw fit to open my heart and home to become a “foster” mom and in 2017 He added another prefix of “adoptive” mom when we adopted our son. After years of heartache and not understanding the “why” behind my struggle, I have found not only the peace of God, but the beauty of the process. God has taken the broken pieces of my life and made a beautiful masterpiece from it. My motto is to live my life with the mindset of choosing to love even if it breaks my heart. Feel free to join me on my journey as I share the ups and downs along with the struggles and breakthroughs of this beautifully broken road to motherhood. I have named my blog "nikki gossett just mom" because that's who I am, just mom, no prefix needed. :)

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